Bottles of the rosé smell like Dolce and Gabbana

Deflation.
Exam is THAAAT exhausting, it sucks so much out from you but do you realize it gives you a lot in return too?

 

 

For the past 2 weeks I spent my every waking hours with friends, making smart conversation, telling embarrassing stories from the past, exchanging the vision of future, like how we are gonna mermaid-fy ourselves in the pool when exam is over.
And it's amusing to see your classmates plucking their hair out because they don't know if they should choose A over B, but C sounds like a correct answer too. C is a bitch.
You know some of them will be with you if you make a mistake. Especially when you scolded yourself for squandering your study time on FB, then you see a few friends of yours updated their statuses. *huuuuuuh,I'm not the only one.

Unlike those despair moment in clinic, you screw your ass over and you'll be there standing alone, covering your face from the dashing pieces of cruelty with one hand, wiping your tears with another hand.

A message from friend when I lost my head in the hills of notes, saying you can do it, this is what exam gave me.
A caring friend helped me to collect my lost memory of clinical features of submucosal fibrosis when I forgot about them, this is what exam gave me.
A friend called me out for fancy dinner amidst apexogenesis and apexification when I didn't have time for my clamouring stomach, this is what exam gave me.

Here is a tip for you if you have exam anytime soon,
DRESS UP NICELY!
Because in case you don't know the answer,
-looking good but stupid, it's 21th century;
-but looking like shit and stupid, the world will abandon you, I kid you not.

Never lose both at the same time, you can't afford that.

A good song is a good song

Simple like that.



I like how every song I listen to has a different part of me in it; I accidentally wired my feeling into the music, every now and then those familiar scent of feeling just pop out whenever I try to immobilise my fractured focus on hundred pages of words.
Too distracted to concentrate.

To fall in love in the city

Falu Red
I walk into the world map
try to dance with shine and glare
but you smudge my unfinished moves
with the stranger's stare

Gamboge
I breath so deep
just to whisper
my wishful thinking
into your folded skin

Fluorescent grey
I refuse your drunken sex
here is my brush
so paint me the shoes
to tiptoe back to my magic map

A poem for my heart

Because they will hunt it down
Want to see the blood red
drip
lick
fade

So I penned them a song
without lyrics

There is where I hide

Waiting for my individualism to shine

As a faithful procrastinator, I live up to my spirit. I gave this shit a go while trying to align all the dysplastic epithelial cells in a more socially acceptable form.

It's EXTREMELY true, I am quite independent of social relationships and very self-reliant.
"You therefore often give others the impression that you are arrogant or snobby - especially because you do not hesitate to speak your mind with your often harsh (even if justified) criticism and your imperturbable self-confidence."
Couldn't agree more mate!

I work alone. When I was in high school I always grabbed the group project firmly in my fists because I didn't think other members can write or draw better than I do. They can just sit back and watch me.
I publicly retorted command from my team captain because I didn't want to join the marching troop under the unbearable weather at 3pm. "You can do what you like but my dad never plan to spend this much money on me so that I can march like a soldier", then I walked out of the field.

When I joined BDS, I met so many awesome people I let them do the job while I sit back to watch.
May be I simply don't care about all those things anymore, I concentrate on my individual happiness, like my single room, my postcards, my drawing.
Having supper with bunch of people still irritates me much. They share stories of how other people screw up their life, laugh at long sentences (it will be too cruel and mean if i name them "joke"), and I can't remember the rest, I always zone out.

Lying on the water and staring into the blue dimension, it's my favourite moment in swimming pool. I don't want to know the disaster in clinic nor the new girlfriend of my classmate.
We're so caught up with the wrong passion. We basically don't feel anything anymore. When we're free we lay back and watch somebody else's emotion,and make them ours. Or pretend they are ours.

Please, be you, be the best version of you.

You be a bitch because you can.

So ashamed to admit this, but I have too many unhealthy theories in my mind. Like Bersih 3.0, they all are clamouring to make a way out to this world.

Saturday night has always been my favourite moment of the week. The idea of sipping on a cup of hot beverage and writing or drawing is very sexy; the process of achieving it with crusty Doughnut in my hand and Cranberries in my ears is simply divine. This is a rare moment when I'll let you slap my face if you're feeling upset because everyone in your class went for movie and never thought of inviting you.
Come hold my hands and join the cleansing breath!

Yesterday Peta and I had this conversation about..being liked. Be frank I have limited comprehension about the feeling of being liked, well given the history that people have been spreading rumours about me, you can't expect much from me. Probably you've heard from someone who is friend with someone who is friend with someone that I'm the stingy weirdo with Marfan Syndrome who refused to pay after hopping a ride to Malacca and complained about lecturer being too harsh on me because I'm a spoiled brat.
It never stop ever since I graduated from high school and stepped into foundation,till now. I never bother to explain.

Back to being liked, I can play nice too if I am after the lunch-with-my-gang-dinner-outside-AIMST routine. Up till tonight, I still enjoy dinner with myself, and with lots of potato in my plate.
Or let's think from a childish aspect, If I learn to be nice at this age, what am I going to do 20 years later? If I misbehave today, the worst that I would get is the poison of my teenage dream; but if I am not friendly when I get 40, I would be in serious shit.

If blogspot doesn't lie, then yesterday I had one new reader from Argentina. I am 23 years old and there is no conclusion for this entry, voila!

Rebel without a cause

"He is so arrogant!"
Not going to lie, I build my reputation on my...hauteur.
I don't say Hi or Bye or Thank you, unless you are my patients; I don't wish you Happy Birthday or Happy Braces-free Day; I will hate you if you approach and ask how is my day; I am not sorry for not being nice to people.

There is this girl who always apologize for, let's say, everything.
There is this boy who always smile and help people.
Sometimes I look at them, hesitating if I should pick up a thing or two from them.But I run away because they scare the hell out of me.
Champagne for girls who cut their heads bold.
All these years I grew up feeling..DECENT, I did my homeworks I finished every single rice in my plate I will be shy if you stared at my drawing for too long.
I like Miley Cyrus and Taylor Momsen, I respect their transformation from sweet princess to Gothic doll.
Ps, I like girl with husky voice and tanned skin, I think it's sexy.

Champagne for boys who ruin their guitars into million pieces.
Honestly I think human being is the biggest demon of all time, especially the smart philosophers. They are still able to control your mind although they are dead for centuries, yet bunch of people spend their life worshiping their wisdom and cleansing power.
You would probably say I'm not mentally healthy; I say this is a fraud of those insecure people who decided to make them the majority and get the power to judge.



Human being like power,some. I've seen this many times in chinese tv show. They work so damn hard and squeeze their life dry, just for the mere promotion and increased salary. The ancient princes killed their siblings for the throne, I asked Melvin why, he said " Everyone wants to be king and be powerful, don't you?"

Seriously?SERIOUSLY??