This is not your clementomy

Why do you have to go and make things so complicated

2012-01-20T15:04:00.005+08:00

I haven't been blogging for SO long I swear the last time I blogged, my currently blooming third molar was still partially erupted. Warn you, you may find my sentences incoherent or words inappropriate, if you notice any missing comma somewhere in between my lines, leave me a note.

Just like when I picked up my reading again (two days back,YEEEHA), those words seem to be needing more time to reach my brain, all the intricate cheerleading count and patient appointments completely sclerosed my arteries and veins, I even forgot to remind my classmates to wear ang ang on our last lecture before Chinese New Year and take happy group pictures, this is cardinal sin, me tell you.

When I grow up I wanna be a star I wanna be famous I wanna be in a movie. Nicole Scherzinger told us that. Now look, she has boobies she danced with the star and she is on People Magazine.
Like a pathetic little bee, I flied around and bugged everyone with my question just two or three days ago, have they always wanted to be a dentist since they were small?

Surprisingly, no one. Except my long term neighbour Aimee, after realizing fireworks will never turn her into Britney, or mermaid.
Stewardess, singer, police, teacher, model (i know right..), dancer, pilot..
This morning I asked Dr R, he wanted to be a DOCTOR doctor, not a dentist doctor.
Normally this is where I write my fancy little theory about our society but sadly, my conclusion for this paragraph is: Bitches, Victoria Secret's models fuck us all.
(Eehehehehe and i get to put their pictures here)

Let alone has the past and future. Honestly I'm satisfied with how I've turned out to be. For example I used to think Britney was the only diva in the world.*scoff. Who am I kidding right?Look at Christina Aguilera and Beyonce.
If there is one accomplishment that I am absolutely so freaking extremely proud of is my evolution, musically. From Backstreet Boys to Miley Cyrus to PussycatDolls to The Beatles, and it goes right up to Genesis and King Crimson and Adam Hurst and of course my favourite The Doors.

Everyone has their unique talent. Like my Brazilian best friend Adriana Peta can dance like...like a Brazilian. If you wanna know what mine is, you are looking at it.

Not trying to boast but I can mix the exact same colour you want by...feeling. Just like swimming, painting has the effect of a spell, taking me out of the ordinary relations with humanity and enclosing my whole body in a sphere by myself.
I draw Destruction, I draw Sex, I draw Inferiority.
Yes society doesn't allow us to exude any of that, people will call you Whore and Victoria will never tell you her Secret.

Life like this you fall you crawl and you take what you can get, and turn it into honesty. Promise me I'll never gonna find you fake it.
No,no.............no!

The ultimate perfecto

2011-10-16T17:10:00.013+08:00

In the city, powerful women are everywhere. Some of them earn more money than men; some of them wear more pants than men.
In my dental building, women dominate the faculty, from the classroom to the clinic. I have 4 female class reps 4 years in a row. Damn right Beyonce, one day girls are gonna run the world.

*Princess Diana, the most perfect woman in every universe.

The woman empowerment arises so quick and so impacted that sometimes I think women secretly want to be their own man. May be plus a vibrator.
That way, they can keep their head focus on the career and protect their hearts from breaking into million pieces, and still get orgasm.
They get the best of every world. They make the best out of every world.
Men can't be the ordinary man anymore, either the supreme womanizer, or a piece of boring shit. And of course, there is always a friendship forever, let's not forget about this.

From what I learnt from movies, woman dated a guy then she will figuratively dissect her date with her bunch of posse, until they all found one tiny nano blemish out of the guy who happen to like the girl very much.
"He likes to shower after sex." "That's so weird.""I know right!"
"He still goes to church with his mum every Sunday..""A HOLY son, seriously?"

*Jamie Oliver, cook and british, flawless!

The process is inevitable, like how men will talk about the same stuff with their buddies.
"I scored again yesterday night.""AGAIN?!"
"Eh check out her twins."
For most city men those trivia doesn't really matter, penetration is the only real deal after all.

Women's expectation towards men is getting higher and higher, they expect man to be as charismatic as spiderman, and exuding the sense of mystery at the same time, like batman. When men's commitment issue is still an insurmountable conundrum, under the colourful neon light, everyone starts looking for a one night fling, nothing serious.
They replaced love with the idea of companionship.

Whore and manwhore, they are the new love.

5 letters. Starting with T and ending with G.

2011-10-14T17:49:00.005+08:00

Am I sensing someTHING between you and that cute butt?

How's the THING going on?

Wow check out that sexy little wild THING!

Honestly it feels..relieved, to replace whatever-it-is with the term THING. It's like as long as you don't label it, or you don't figure out what the hell it is, then you don't have to carry the responsibility on your shoulder.

"Dude/Girl (I don't wanna be a sexist here), you broke her/his heart!"
"Whatever, it's not like we have love, it's just one of those things you know."

I blame it on our age, that sometimes when it comes to love, we sorta..handle it offhandedly.
Is it because we've waited long enough so when the sweet moment left and we don't feel right anymore, we tend to skip the middle-whatever-it-is part and jump right into the verdict.

Let's see..set eyes on the target..stalking on FB..scratch off your scalp thinking how to get the handphone number..sms everywhere everytime..sitting in cafe/library/swimming pool forever just to bump into that person accidentally on purpose..the pretentious FB chat..ceaseless flirting and scheming..FINALLY.FIRST.DATE.

Well, it's indeed a long preparation.
Boy was enchanted to meet the girl; Girl was thinking how to be the person he misses at night.
Both side want to know how the thing leads them to any level, see how thing goes!
I believe that's why some people ended their relationship hastily before the boiled water manage to soften your instant cup noodles, because they CAN leave everything behind and get ready for the next exciting, refreshing, better experience (they think.HA!).

It's like root canal treatment, we take multiple visits to access and shape the desirable form, but when the thing is done, we only take 15 mins (30 mins top) to seal the whole thing that we've worked for the past few weeks. BYE. Never going to see you again.

Beep.

"Hey clement you wanna hang out?"
*Staring at my tumblr and other window tabs
"Err, no. I have a thing later."
*Continue tumblring.

Easy. No guilt at all.

To the moon. And back.

2011-06-29T14:00:00.003+08:00

I've been away for so long but what can I say, tumblr has more fascinating pictures than clementomy.
It's such a convenient tool to express what I want to say, and what I don't want to say. Just strolling down the page and click "Reblog" whenever I see pretty/funny/obscene picture.

The brilliant creator designed it in such a simple form, to the extent that I don't care if I ever put any effort in explaining my smile and tears. A picture tells it all, which lead me to a belief that one day all the novel will be evolved into picture form, just like kid story books, because adults are too busy to translate words with their brain.

When I feel sad I reblog a picture of strangers with their tears rolling down.
When I am happy I reblog picture of Nicole Scherzinger.
When I get lonely I reblog picture of couples kissing in bed. or something like that HAHAHA.

My emotion has became less valuable because it's not as beautifully photographed as others'.
Because I, the master of my own body, don't give a damn to put it down in words or if I choose the right word to express my feeling anymore.

But things will come to a halt no matter how terrific it has been, like how I came to this point finding watching adult movie as meaningless as waiting for poo to come out.
But I know the ending of something will carry out the outset of something else, in character radiation style, the vacancy will never be empty.

I am happy. And I know why. So clap my hands.

2011-05-17T12:48:00.002+08:00

Macam macam

2011-04-30T23:44:00.006+08:00

The Royal Wedding
29th April 2011, my FB homepage was ALL about the prince and princess. Some updated their status every 3 secs like nobody knows that day was the wedding day.
Most of the girls awwed: so romantic! I want a wedding JUST like this!

I don't understand, even the prince's vow melted their hearts easily.
It's the same speech in every romance movie. IT'S THE SAME AS YOUR PARENTS' ONE LA PLEASE.
They said it's a beautiful fairy tale.Is it because the prince is real?
Really.It takes more than a beautiful face or a stunning dress to win the title Duchess of Cambridge.
Like my friend Gerviene said: Itu hati mesti kuat.
When she married a prince, she married the whole world. People will read your lips from far. People will start searching for your flaw under microscope.
Conclusion. Stop stalking Prince Harry!

Movies/Series
Recently it came to my notice that I have a complete different taste in movies and series. I watch 90210-uglybetty-gossipgirl-trueblood-Hawaii 50 and I watch empireofthesun-thekingspeech-blackswan-myfairlady-themachinist.
How weird.

Teenage stars
I feel sorry for them. Like miley cyrus justin bieber rebecca black.
Some people JUST have to tease them over and over and over...non stop.
Those disney channel parents complained the 18 years old being a bad influence. Blame the culture.
Somebody said the 14 years old's concert is a massacre.
Why so cruel human?
It takes experiences to make a star.

Underwear
(I don't have any underwear pic and I don't wish to google it.)

My underpants are all so tight lately. I need to buy boxer brief instead of the traditional triangle. Piece of advice: Be a man. Buy your own private garments. Don't wait for your mum she doesn't know your size.

It's these little things

2011-04-19T21:25:00.009+08:00

That remind me of you.

I googled so many stories about how others miss their grandpa I wanna write the best story of you.
What should I do to let you know how much I've missed you since you've been away?

The caring eyes of Charles Xavier in Xmen.
The wit of Gandalf in LOTR.
The physique of Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter.

There are moments when I wanna call you but I know you won't be there.
And there are countless nights when I need bedtime stories but I know those untold stories will be remained unfolded.
Also there are moments when I thought "Ah I should tell grandpa this I think he'll like this" and I know you'll get my message, somehow.(you do right?)

Are you proud of who I am?
I remember you were so proud of another grandson of yours who scored 5As in UPSR.
Do you think I can trace the same happiness in your eyes if I told you I'll be a dentist one day?
I need a reassurance, which I can't get from anyone else.
How I wish I have just one more chance to look into your eyes and see you looking back.
Would you tell me if I am doing the right thing?

Flashback.Swirl.
Regret is the only word I managed to rummage from the mixed up memory.
I should have held your callous hands more often.
I should have walked with you to the park more frequently.

I wanna know if you used to ponteng class too.
I wanna know did your heart race in your skin tight jeans when you had your first kiss.
I wanna know the story when you hid in jungle during the 513.
I wanna hug you. Simply.

I am done, smoking gun.

2011-03-23T02:09:00.006+08:00

Putting back 'A Special Providence' to my little bookshelf and slowly, very slowly choosing another book, all the emotions that I've managed to muster get bewildered.

I just finished soaking myself in a second world war story and soon I'm gonna explore another different world, it also means my holiday entertainment just got cut down to a countable number.

Diagnosis: another Tuesday night with insomnia.

With the dim tinge of disorientation lingering in the damp atmosphere, I am losing something I can't quite recognise, bit by bit. I can't help thinking what would have happened in my life if the word "what if" could prove its significant existence.

If I insisted to continue my art lesson, may be I can be a happy painter one day.

If I had a big brother who can teach my basketball or some lame pick up lines, may be masturbation wouldn't be a very sinful thing afterall.

If I had a patient tomorrow, I wouldn't be holding my warm milk around 2am, listening to my new favourite singer.

If I never spent 6 years in a boarding school, right now my heart would be pounding frantically at the thought of going home this weekend.

If I can be less sentimental, who knows I'll have a wider acquaintance.

Now I am aware, I am losing the sense of reality.

Let it out.

2011-03-16T19:48:00.004+08:00

Because I am sad.
Because I don't want to withhold my lugubriousness.
Because I want to be emotional, once in a blue moon.

I play my swearing scene repetitvely, in my imagination.
Imagination, because it's safe. (And I can practise in different tones.)

Curiosity. Everybody seems so happy, every minute.
Peer pressure. It makes me fragile in the presence of any unpleasant post-puberty sorrow.
Reassurance. I want to see your indignation.

I want to know we're normal too.

不是我说了就算

2011-03-13T10:48:00.003+08:00

搁下了1095天的中文字
纳闷是怎样的定律把我们拉扯得那么远
就连呼吸也不再那么地优美

西边文化努力学了那么久
逆着成长岁月的光难过地在两岸间摇曳的吊
我不要那样的自由
我不懂那样的懦弱

以前的右手写了这么多词
如今的左手只能哀叹得那么冲动

"
今早的晨星一闪一闪

刚睁开眼的那刻心情总是好好的
听窗外的芭蕉叶嗄嗄作响
看着那重复了无限次数的日出心中踏实了
但
那分短暂的幸福终会是上一秒的事

慵懒地呼吸
朋友离弃的感觉早已在泪光的见证下被打上了麻醉剂
孤独的绝情划破了我的真心

那么多的付出与努力随血流滴
总以为一切的一切都会在句点上结束
但事实却嘲笑我的天真
叹

爱或许冰冻得不够彻底
心头的疤那最好的哭泣
朋友对我坚强的笑容惊叹不已
又有谁会问一句一个人的天空色泽是不是那么的清晰

--2006/03/29 "

Exactly.

2011-02-14T18:19:00.007+08:00

Sophomore, such a beautiful word, like sapphire.
I think these two words are equally valuable. Not only they sound sexy they are intelligent too.

In Freshmen Year everybody was like-just-light-cured-composite. Some are rough some are as absorbable as the radical oxygen layer ready to be filled in with every raw thing and some are already very pretty(this is so totally not me).

Come to Sophomore Year. After a whole year of polishing everybody get so close with everybody we shrink into one piece. We are so ready to shine like a sapphire in the coming future, naively.

I got so chagrined to learn that the next year is called Final Year and I've only accomplished less than 10 restorations how could it be final? I name the third year Valour Year. We need to get rid of any stymie or dummy and treat REAL patient ok. And we practise many challenging stunts.

It's very despondent not able to write something brilliant at the age of 22 and still bemoaning in my self pity. The 18 years old me can find the flaw in Newton Third Law (i was such a cool kid); now my bed time story is Sex and The City (manwhore alert!).

Devolution. Like how the old handphone dai gor dai developed into tiny handphone and recently transformed into my face-sized Galaxy Tab. It's a sign. One day contact lens will be so obsolete and my 6 years old nerdy specs will be the fashion icon again.

What an emo entry! What can I say. Everybody got so busy soaking themselves in the romantic Valentine Day and I'm staying in my room sharing this with my only viewer chelseaorange, and youtubing Apple Bottom Jeans Dance. I got so low low low low low low...

"They gave up days and weeks of their lives, addicted to someone else's drama."-Tuesday with Morrie. (so damn true.but it's ok.teenagers are supposed to be fun, and stupid.)

Hola Happy Birthday :)

2011-01-13T16:54:00.006+08:00

*Robert Stack-1919
I don't celebrate birthday.(and I finally know why).
But it seems like a uncomprehending important thing.

May be it's because I have a 3-in-1 dentistry paper on my birthday. And thank God that paper was easy.
They said your birthday will always be a unrivaled lucky day.

*Patrick Dempsey-1966
But I was born on 13th January 1989 and it was a Friday.

Yes 13 and friday, the ineffable figures.

*Orlando Bloom-1977
At the night when I was born some freaking virus invaded most of the computers of UK and triggered grievous impact on the government and some major companies.

And my birthday was and will always crush with the exam period in my university life.

*Beau Mirchoff-1989 (same as me)
This is a sign.
Don't provoke me. May be I have some inexorable dark power radiate from my fingers and it'll make you eyebrowless!

Now you know where my HOTNESS come from!

SECRET

2010-12-30T12:54:00.003+08:00

Anyway, read jason mraz's love story.
The man who sings 'Prettiest Friend'. so sweet right :)

I'm not a fun guy.

2010-12-27T14:20:00.008+08:00

You know when you're supposed to focus on phagocytosizing your notes but you have the congenital procrastinator disorder, this is the time when your imagination comes alive and bring you to the universe.
If the condition is chronic enough you might be able to recall how much money you owe the girl who sits next to you and what have you done right after the second year final exam.

I can remember clearly what I did right after my major exam last year. Or few months back.

Ok I cleaned my room. And filed up my notes.
These are the SAME two things that I do EVERYTIME the liberty bell rings.

Somehow it confuses me how do those people manage to go out after exam. It's not like I am THAT fatigue but I always end up cleaning my room and notes and go to bed when the dawn breaks the serene horizon.

I remembered Melvin once said this to me when he came back from Redang Trip after the 2nd year final : Harrr you stay in your room ONLY for so maaaaaaany days? Not sien(boring) meh?

No la I did go down to cafe for meals.

*KK asked me the same question few hours ago. And I curi-curi edited his photo HAHA :)

Yes I guess you're right. I'm really really really(3 times!) a vapid teenager.
Staying in my room and read my story books and watched my favourite shows, so far that was the closest to the best time of my life.
See.

Go out with friends la or eat some cheese cakes or inhale the delightful oxygen in shopping mall la!
Uhh.neh!
I already spent a lot of time for exam and my nerve impulses were maintained at the plateau level for few months that's insane.
I need time for myself. Like a mini meditation but not that spiritual or ethical.

Like..spending time to know more about yourself. Then may be you get bored then you watch porn and masturbate. That's COMPLETELY fine. After that you continue your rumination about forgiveness and love.

Or like..You read others' blogs and discover the other human beings on the other side of the earth. Not necessary have to go out and catch the latest movie in cinema. OMG i'm so antisocial.

*I want to watch this movie - Natalie Portman's Black Swan!!!

And like..(Oh this is my favourite!) Imagine how're you going to meet your future wife. Is it like you running your finger across those book spines in an ancient library and there is another lovely lady with plaits doing the exact same thing from the opposite site and finally two fingers stop at the same book and you two exchange a small grin?(but if the book is Fight Club then probably i'll take the book and run HAHAHAHA)

*FYI that is Audrey Hepburn

Or you're licking your favourite icecream in a joyful beach together with your adopted son and then your little cute son goes make friend with a little cute girl who is sitting with her very young mother at the bench next to yours.

Told you. Imagination brings you to travel the infinite universe especially during exam period.

Time to study!

Love For A Child

2010-12-12T12:30:00.004+08:00

Dear Baby

I hear you calling, but I can't come home right now.

It breaks my heart to hear that your psychotic foster mother slapped you AGAIN!!
My mum told me your cheek was swelling and covered with bruise. I pray that you'd be still naive enough to ignore this kinda traumatic scar.
I don't want you to remember all these shit. You can have a beautiful life.

You cried when you wanted to pee and I was bemused. Then my mum told me that when you were small that insane bitch slapped you when you peed in your pants.
(For fuck's sake you're still a 2 years old baby.)
Now you have this peephobia.

That bitch slapped you when you refused to take medicine.
COME ON EVERY BABY CRIES WHEN IT COMES TO TAKING MEDICINE. USE YOUR BRAIN BITCH!

Yesterday that bitch slapped you again BECAUSE she doesn't like people crying in the morning.
-___________-
Seriously?
FUCK YOU.

If you don't know how to love a child please don't adopt one at the first place.
And if you do love the child then you will never leave your child in my house for the coming Chinese New Year and you two grown up will be having sinful fun in Australia.

Baby I've changed my Christmas wish.
I want you to grow up in love.

Baby please don't wail.
It hurts me whenever I see your tears.
I have this uncomprehending apprehension everytime I squeeze your tiny body in my arms.
Your eyes reminded me of your biological mother who dumped you when you were born.

Fear no. I'll kick those misery out of you with my love in no time.

My armpits cold sweat when I get nervous

2010-12-08T17:02:00.008+08:00

(not a very pleasant title isn't it?)

Like during my first clinic session I went to the washroom every 0.5 minutes (to *ahem-dry my armpits-ahem*) before my patient show up.
Part of me was praying harder than usual hoping he wouldn't turn up. Well. All I can say is my dream came true, eventually.
(he skipped my dental appointment twice and the only time he came i waited for one and a half hour. Now i'm praying for a new and punctual patient)

Like when Aimee asked me to try the pendulum stunt this Thursday. I was incredibly ecstatic and my armpits were cold sweating in sync -___________-
After watching the video and I came across this comment : Did the cheerleader die?
*sorry i need to stop typing. My hand is busy looking for tissue papers again

Like when I imagine the restorationS (yes i need to emphasize the S) that I'm going to try this Friday..oh poor soul.
I've never done any restoration on REAL patient yet NOT EVEN ONCE! How am I gonna do six restorations in 2 and a half hours?
Are you armpit cold sweating?

Oh yeah you bet!

This reminded me that I have oral radio practical next Tuesday and Dr Sham asked me (very specific ME) to memorize the angulation.

It's Christmas.Again.

2010-12-04T19:58:00.006+08:00

I love Christmas. Everyone does.

In fact I used to sit by the window sill on Christmas morning to check whether God will show His mercy and miracle by giving Malaysia a white christmas.
As much as I can remember I never had any white Christmas so let's keep our fingers and toes crossed.

Eventually the absence of snow doesn't bother me anymore ever since Harry Potter first joined my Christmas with his sorcerer's stone.

Somehow I invited Harry Potter and his gang to my Christmas Night every year and we enjoyed the magic movies together, but my guests always sat opposite me and squeezed their asses in a small electronic box.

I guess this is their Hogwarts courtesy.

There is rumour spreading around saying Neville Longbottom is a catch and Hermione Granger finally get rid of her puffy hair.

I'll ask them 3 weeks later.

Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time.
Merry Christmas people.

(Oh that's my room door isn't it beautiful?)

Because tomorrow is Thursday.I'm free.

2010-12-01T21:58:00.002+08:00

Kemouliewan.

2010-11-30T13:45:00.004+08:00

Do you mind shut your fucking mouth up?

2010-11-28T11:13:00.002+08:00

Yes that's so much better. Thanks.

To the stars!

2010-11-25T22:05:00.002+08:00

They say I look better with love

2010-11-21T23:06:00.007+08:00

But love looks better with us.

Men seeking woman. Woman seeking love.
The entire process is irritatingly fidgety yet consummate.

I know I should be more chary of the chortle everytime you're around.
I shouldn't have let the scruple prowled away.

Thanks KK (the glamorous king) for styling my hair.

The cupidity for love is macabre.

But somehow I got fettered in it, nothing loath.
I can't obviate the faux pas. I don't want to.

OMG the gorgeous queen belly-danced like a snake.

Dusk indulges my squawk whenever I let the whip hustles my elan to a corner.
I writhe in agony.
The timbre of tear should be utterly devoid of love.
But with more valour.

I'm pulling back my heart.
Although it'll end up tearing apart.
This is me. Forcing myself out once I started falling in.
I go for extremity. Just yes or no.

Because the answer is always a NO.
So I shall stop languishing in this voluptuous imagination of mine with a full stop.

I find myself terribly gauche

2010-10-17T16:56:00.007+08:00

How I wish I were him

Since the frequency of me gnawing my day off by facebooking is getting higher and higher.
Not to mention the butt shape stain left on my chair.

The weather's been so crazy and I barely move my ass.
Despite the fact that everyone is hanging out with everyone it doesn't pull me out from my alone-yet-not-lonely imaginary world.
This debilitating lifestyle I'm leading isn't healthy.

Friends like to tell me their stories.
Well I'm everybody's confidant I know.
Okay now you have a problem with that statement. Don't give me that look.

"If I want to play with you then I'll bring you to cemetery and watch Psycho there. And if I don't want to fuck around with you, then I guess I'll smash your ass when you try to high five me."

I answered my friend callously when he told me all his kindergarten friendship problems that he 's been dealing with.

That is my solution.

Asshole.I know.I am.

My dad always asked me to make friends with everyone.
Who knows you might need them one day.
Oh well I don't think I will live that long on earth.
Come on cancer is everywhere nowadays. Plus that Superbacteria already started building up its fame.
Why bother smiling to people that you don't want to hang out with?
Just tell them there is always some other nicer people who will appreciate them.
And if I really have problem next time then I'll suck it up.

At least I'm a nano better than those who told me every single bad thing about the other human whom you give him your fake sweet grin every morning.

What a contumely huh.

This is not a piece of paradigm that would promise you a better life.
Just my another shit that refused to come out from my anal.

Bastard.I know.I am.

Let me be nice for once.
Blake Lively! The temperature outside is nothing.

These Romantic comedies.

2010-09-20T12:54:00.002+08:00

They make me wanna cook a pot of loving relationship so ruthlessly to throttle the deadpan celibacy.

Because it's not THAT easy to hunt down THE ONE during the ocean of stranger.
Hence I was flummoxed and made a dramatic decision that night.

The next morning I woke up early and spruced up myself.
I rubbed the soap vigorously on my skin, hoping every spore will absorb the tinge of fragrance.
Not too soft but not too showy.
I chose the most marvelous shirt I ever had.
Gel my hair.
Cover my acne.
And way before everything I did some push up to obtrude the muscle.
Yes I am that kind of..whatever you call it.

After that I grabbed my books and mp4.
Oh yes bookish and vibrant!
And of course I changed my nerdy specs before leaving the house.

Feeling the morning fresh breeze I told myself nonchalantly:
Everything is just gonna be fine.

I got a table in library and started reading Local Anesthesia.
The Hannah Montana songs were playing in my mp4.
It reminded me of those hilarious scenes of Miley and Jackson.
And Lily and Oliver.
Then I burst into laughter.

Play cool man. Stop smirking!
No gawky ogrish scraggly thing. Not today!
Okay come back come back.
.
..
...

Then I look at my watch.

Oh man...
I got myself lost in the book for few hours.
And I forgot about my mission completely.
I closed the Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.(HAHAHA)

I went back to my room.
And here I am writing down my pathetic pantomime.

It's okay.
Those people in the movies always had 4287650 lovers before THE ONE.
Even Prince Philip also had to killed the Maleficent before he kissed Princess Aurora.

Tomorrow is gonna be a fairy tale.

When I rattle on my thought of independence

2010-08-26T22:56:00.007+08:00

it writhes my consciousness in staccato.

If Independence can be categorized into Physical Independence and Mental Independence I am bloody sure I'll score a turd in the latter aspect. Or may be both.
Spending 6 years in boarding school definitely didn't expunge me from the list of sybaritic tyke.

I am still loath to do my laundry.
I need a slave.
I am irascible.
Don't you ever comment on my frailty if you don't want to taste my callous exasperation.

Although my mind constantly hypnotizing myself, saying I am a fully fledged teen and I can drink coca-cola as much as my dad does, in fact it isn't hard to find out the same inscrutable mind's avarice for being coddled by his mum.

ibu is a prettie. She has long and slender legs.

Well I get miffed when my mum calls me 5 times a day but still..ibu is ibu. She gotta do what she gotta do.
Like other housewives, my mum loves to tell me all the gossips in my neighbourhood. Indeed my sister finds it very mou liew and always complains my mum talks too loud to the phone, strangers on 10 streets away can hear my mum unbearable lovely laughter.

Nonetheless I think this is her kinda odd and unique modus operandi to let us know where we belong to after spending those countless days apart from the neighbourhood.

I totally inherited her leg gene.

Frankly I enjoy the way my mum starts our new day together with a cup of morning milk and the story of her friend's dentist daughter.

Ooy how about your squawk about being an independent and intelligent young man then?

Well I don't mind strangers peering at me in toilet as like I can feel their eyes burning a hole in the back of my head while I attempt to force out a pitiful amount of urine that can constitute a piss, if you consider this as a special part of deviated independence..

ye ken what ah'm saying?

2010-08-16T09:09:00.009+08:00

Here it is the paroxysm of despondency when the ending of holidays chimed.
I appease my inscrutable chagrin, thinking the school will be bedecked with tennis girls in short white skirt.
I narcotize my fidgety loathing, imagining the lashing of exhilaration when you meet the familiar faces again.(like when Harry meets Ron and Hermione!)

But this is what I felt when the bus approaching SP bus station.

The miffed raid of adrenaline.
Involuntary throbbing of my gluteus maximus.
The dour squawk of arteries. I didn't even notice my mp4 ran out of battery.
Callous freezing of my feet. I contracted my toes spontaneously.

Yea I was in orgasm physically but languished in the deadpan oblivion sexually.
I was bloody nervous.
How ludicrous.

Deep down I know I don't like being a dentist anymore.

The bespoke blue suit doesn't deserve an oaf.
Delirium.
Give me some Veronal.

I guess it's time to go home

2010-07-12T23:08:00.005+08:00

I don't know but if you ask me specifically do I miss home?
I don't think so.

People judge.
Everyone does.
A photo.A word.A decision.An expression.
That's the reason people always don't understand the reality.
They believe what they think and what they see and they make the judgement hastily without giving the effort to understand you better or deeper.
What a rushing world.Absurdity.Fake.

Yes JohnMayer I live so well in my imagination too.

I barely step out from my room after the final exam.

(Go ahead with your little judgement.sick.sociophobia.what-screwyourlittlestinkingtongueidon't fuckingcare-ever)

The hectic living schedule evacuate my soul.
The way they build up the interactions just make me so..exhausted.
So many people out there don't give a shit to themselves.
They just go out having fanatic fun and die in bed when the moon says hello.
That's how the youth rock the world,you said.

Well you want to know my thought?
I would rather extract my teeth one by one without any anaesthesia.
(No that's just kidding.I can't abide the kind of agony.)

He is Tyler. I gave birth to my baby when the final started.

He grows 3cm in one day, and I feed him with just water.
Sadly I am uncertain that I can see the budding of my wit after 21 years of nutrition and education.

Anyway. Just go home.

The place where you were born.
Then figure out a way to furbish your man suit.
I think reading is a pretty smart way.

"Didn't you realize that each of us is a sacred,unique snowflake of special unique specialness?"- Chuck Palahniuk.

Recipe

2010-06-01T14:13:00.003+08:00

Thing about Fight Club is
You get the points
You'll be so trapped in Tyler Durden's illustration.

If you don't
Then go back and lick your 12 years education.

Excuse me what's her name?

2010-05-24T12:45:00.003+08:00

Diva.

My mum can't remember my friends' names.
So I put unique nickname tags on them.
Like 'the cleanliness no 1'.

If someone wants to know NSP's name, she can just turn her head 45 degree to the right and say:
The Queen.

And Peta would point her index finger to the sky and shakes her ass slightly to right, say:
The LadyGaga. Don't forget this!

Easy job huh!

This is a simple world.
But the homosapiens like to complicate it just to show the ants how twisted their minds are.
They even have a formula to calculate the morality.
Eff my ass.
Moral is a whole thing. We can't dissect it into parts and magnify every pieces like what we've done to sperm.
It changes with time.It's dynamic.
Morality can't be perfect.

Now men wear this thing. Man-Heels.Or Meels.

I can be a megging model if I fail year two.

Emm excuse me what's your name?
Me?Ohh..The toilet bowl.

Relax your eyes

2010-05-15T17:07:00.003+08:00

-R-E-L-A-X-

Now S.T.A.R.E. at our jackets for 5 secs.

1
2
3
4
5.

Yes.see the similarity?

Mou Liu.

I wanna be as thin as clement

2010-05-05T17:46:00.005+08:00

SHUTthefuckUP.

Being a lanky young man will not bring you a Guinness World Record.
And probably(97%):

1.you'll get tossed in cheerleading

Of course this's as exciting+phobic as roller coaster.
But be frank the possibility that you might slam the concrete floor is still existing.
"hey clement I found your sublingual gland near the swimming pool!it's ok.don't need to thank me.

Aimeelee this is our roller coaster face!

2.people thought you jerk off everyday
Your obtrusive rib cage will frighten the vampire.
Your girlfriend screams like hell in the mid way of having sex because she touches your false ribs and you think your 5cm penis makes her so orgasmic.
ok this is just a hypothesis.

3.anorexia suspected
Your relatives will keep adding stuff in your plate(NICE!) during wedding dinner. Then they'll secretly bitch about your nerdyskinnyanorectic look.
And your parents thought you burn the midnight oil everyday.

unfortunately...the smaller one is mine.the other one is my acromegalied classrep.

4.you can't do sports
Because your not-gonna-be teammates have to protect your skeleton from being fractured by the ball although you are able to take care of yourself.
I remember I heard this during adsalympic.
"Ask clement run 4x100 la then we'll have enough people."
Then another bastard said
"Stop kidding."
wtf.

5.you'll be abs-less and ass-less
It's prevalent to get excruciating hip-ache after sitting for like 1 hour.
Of course those people who try to spank your ass may get their wrists twisted.
Abs-less, this is as cruel as global warming.
I can't think of any good word to describe the abs-less me.
"wow clement.you look so....calm."

shan ah! go feed yourself with Enfagrow A+ before you go jogging!!

Don't forget you were the sperm who won the race

2010-05-02T14:41:00.007+08:00

Sometimes I wonder would that make any difference if I let other sperm out ran me.
Yea the baby'll still weeps like he lost his rib.
But may be the baby will grow up as a hot sporty brilliant young man.
Or may be the baby is a girl. Then she can marry Prince Harry.

(ohh i love the hand draw cartoons)

People always say "If........"
Because they think they deserve the best thing in the universe so they ceaselessly compare themselves with the imaginary perfect future.

But how do you know you'll attain a better answer if you're given a second chance?

They waive their privilege to learn because failure tastes like a fermented lollipop.
This is not what university students do.
We need to learn.
At least you save something pragmatic and witty in your void brain besides those sex positions which make you feel like you're closer to God.

My communication lecturer pushed me into the vortex of rumination by spelling the word 'THINKER'.

Such a weighty word.
I don't know you but I seldom THINK.
Yes saying chuck palaniuk's quotations makes me feel incredibly amazed.
But it just means that I am imitating his thoughts no matter how much I support his tracks of theorizing.
(oh no i am a thought bubble stealer)

May be next time I will come out with my own smart line like:
This is a perky-butt world the same way as abortion is another kind of dark fashion.

(wtf is that you stupid clement)

Starter For Ten

2010-04-21T21:54:00.006+08:00

That book was hilarious.
(Somehow I think the movie was a little bit...vapid.)

But I was freaking astounded that Shanmugam came to my mind when the author introduced the main character Brian Jackson.

Give me indigenous astonishment.
Flash.

So practically I just envisaged Shan doing all those things in my eyes.
"The ironic thing is, I actually am a vicar!"
Shan is a vicar?!
"For a moment I find myself contemplating the politics of this black lacy bra."
Shan is thinking about bra?!

Give me restraint.
Flash.

Let me show you their similarities.

1.Hair
Brian thinks his hair looks like a large bell. Well his friend Tone describes it as the end of a knob.
HAHAHAHA.lmao.
Shan's hair was like that before his extreme make-over ok.

2.Brian has his father's jacket in his wardrobe.
Shan showed me his father/uncle clothes before.

3.Brian knows all the movie actors/actress.
Brian describes guy who runs five miles carrying a load of library books(fit and clever) as Dustin Hoffman in Marathon Man.
Like may be Shan'll say 'Clement is the Daniel Radcliffe in Harry Potter when he smiles' instead of 'Clement is showing a BIGFAT grin'.
Or Shan'll say 'Clement is Taylor Lautner' instead of 'his brawn is as BIG(HAHAHA) as his head'.

Give me brazenness

Flash.

4.Sport
Brian goes sport after he falls in love with a girl named Alice.
Shan starts doing sport after _______________.

5.Knowledge
Brian knows R.J.Mitchell the aeronautical engineer died in 1937.
Shan knows lot of weird stuffs too. Like this "..Imperial Russian Navy's flagship in the Battle of Tsushima, during the Russo-Japanese War of 1904-1905. "

(wth is that)

6.Joke
Seems like Brian is the only one who understand his own jokes in the book. Alice always laugh awkwardly after Brian explained that it was actually a joke.
Sometimes I'll just stare at Shan, murmuring in my heart: Is that a statement or a joke? Because his always give you the same face!

Give me a good night yawn.
Flash.

Dear My Body

2010-04-17T19:39:00.005+08:00

I apologize.
I haven't always treated you with love and respect.

You've gone through so much sorrows and distortions.
All those malnourished agony of overeating and starvation make you a fragile creation.
You don't have to abide all the shameful consequences because of my wacky hormonal drive but you still sacrifice for the useless me each and every hour of each and everyday.

I never fully protect you.
That's why acnes grow on you.
And diarrhea, scar..flaw.

I insulted you.
And I let other people tramp on your dignity which makes me more despicable.
I've used so many fatuous words to delineate you:
ugly,disgusting,monstrous,butt-less,sport-less...

I am sorry.
And I shall prove my remorse by honoring you with gym every night.
Of course I am sure you can feel my appreciation as the biceps grow bigger and I can stow more love inside the fibers.

Thank you for always being there, Body.

You knew you are wrong

2010-04-02T21:13:00.008+08:00

I tried to peek at her answer when invigilator was collecting other answer booklets.
Then she covered her answer sheet.
Like how Tom Cruise protected his daughter from being caught by paparazzi's lens.

(Yes I cheated in exam)

I can tell from some people faces whom I told them about my failure, that they actually think that is selfishness.

I hit myself with deep remorse on the toilet bowl.

What's wrong with you clement?
Her obedience to the rule is misinterpreted as a kind of cruelty.
Her behavior is misunderstood as abnormality.
Then what are you?

Silence.
Rumination.

Well whatever is past belongs to past.
Exam DOES make everything looks prettier.
And I am so ugly.

That was a night HuiLing and I hung out at the clock tower there talking for 1 hour.
We were too stressed out because of the exam.
Sitting at the bench and did some chatting, staring at the the frosty firmament and luminous stars, led me to a fact that I haven't been so close to the nightly nature for a period of time.

The brisk breeze made me felt like dancing.

Damn you internet.

7am.
I saw bunch of future leaders walked to cafe.
Air in the dawn was cold.
It was strange to actually feel the moisture in SP recently.
Clusters of crimson flowers formed the canopy at the top of trees.
That was..beautiful. Mesmerizing.

7pm.
I saw security guards ran back home.
Yes they RAN.
They jumped on the benches, they hit the other's ass, they talked in the language which I don't understand.
They just seemed so exhilarated. Everyday.
They smiled to me.
I guessed that was their way to wish me good luck.

I like the smell of ironing. It smells like..fashion.

Warning letter.

2010-03-17T21:04:00.002+08:00

Dear Mr. CA:

Concerning to the above matter, we have a user complaining you sucks his ass away little by little during his exam period. Now he has to sit with his hips which makes him so fucking pain. His hips don't lie.

Your behavior is unscrupulous and it devastates human civilization. You are one fucking son of the bitch. You'll go to hell.

We demand you to return his ass A.S.A.P. thief. Thank you for your cooperation.

Faithfully,
Human Ass Sdn. Bhd.

You

2010-03-14T20:23:00.003+08:00

You immerse your eyes under the horizontal ripples.
You wonder where does the bubble come from.
You forget how to breath.
You don't know how to survive.

And there is another bubble.
You are mesmerized by the curve.
You close your eyes.

I felt like a Cyberman.

2010-03-11T12:57:00.002+08:00

Because the x-ray thingy is so cool.
By the way, I will make you think of me next time you see the name 'ugly betty'!

This video made my jaw dislocated.
(I am not sure the video is available. Go youtube 'jimmy handsome men's club' if you can't watch the video here.)

This is what you like to say

2010-03-09T01:14:00.012+08:00

Clement is cissychildishqueeruselessweirdo.
My mouth keeps silence (and sometimes I compensate with a grin nonchalantly).
I smirk everytime my disheartened dignity get insulted.
BUT my innards are actually burning with jargons of swearing!

It doesn't mean I am bloody hypocrite.
Sorry I don't have the bellicose cock/vajayjay like you do.
My own little world is already freaking treacherous wobble.
I don't wish to trigger any more hubbubs.

Who doesn't want to be the perfect human with IQ345?
But I am born in the way God wants me to be and do you have any problem with that?
Oh yes your canine is longer than mine then go bite on some other dicks please!
I don't need you to build up my heart pulse, trashes!

You know nothing for what I am going through.
Nobody has any idea about that.
You look at my face.
"He is surely the baby in his family!"
You stare at me.
"Must be damn rich,spoiled child!"

Have you ever read my eyes?

I blame myself for every seditious altercation my sisters have with my parents.
I blame myself when my parents wanted to divorce.
I blame myself for every tear my mother ever dropped.
I blame myself when my sister failed her exam.
I blame myself when my sister faces the legal issues and couldn't continue her study.
I blame myself for my dad's unstable emotion.

It's my fault for unreasonable mockeries.
It's my mistake when people speak to me in their pompous and scornful way.
It's my fault for my annoying existence.
It's my mistake when I am diffident to live my own life.
Because I think may be your life will be more wonderful without the imperfection like me.

Hypochondria.

I used to take slow step before entering my house, worrying was there any fray inside.
I used to bath so quickly just to make sure everyone is fine whenever I spent my time in bathroom.
I used to be fucking silent so that my freaky voice wouldn't bother them.
I used to have my emotion wobbling at the brink of precipice.

Those crestfallen things cobble together my so-called life.
Sorry. Not very sweet stuffs.

I am not trying to make you think that I am pity or comparing my problems with yours or whatsoever.
Sorry I don't need that. Thank you.
I am just a bumpkin knowing nothing.

Yes I can't pronounce 'enthusiastically' fast and accurate so what?

I fake a smile

2010-03-07T19:50:00.002+08:00

Because I am not ok.

I should stop embarrassing myself

2010-03-04T10:36:00.004+08:00

May be you're right.

I like how peta runs her blog.
She somehow manages to sum up her feelings in her blog almost everyday.
And I am just able to cobble together those trashes.
Because I have no idea what is going on in my life.

I am pathetic.
I am desperate.
I secretly wish there is a stranger in msn whom I can talk to.
You know.Everything.

I am a meretricious fool.
I am yokel.
If there is a choice, I wouldn't want to be human again.
I hope I can be the music.
Running across the desert in Mongolia over and over again.

There is always a perfect moral yardstick out there.
And my life is circumscribed within the circle.
I wonder how would it be if I can step out from the that's-the-things-you-ought-to-do line.
But some people will screw my messy ass up.

This is the time.
Leave me alone.
Huiling suggested that our life will be completed only when we found our the other half.
But I don't even own my life so how can I promise another new life?

You don't get to judge me.

If this is the time to choose

2010-02-25T11:28:00.006+08:00

I would say I prefer being single.

People around me are so intrigued with my option in a new relationship.
(Huiling I am talking about you HAHA)
My mum likes to introduce her friend's aunt's nephew's daughter's classmate's neighbour to me.
"See..She is pretty, clever, and a christian! Go talk to her!"
My dad always asks:
"Eh..bring your girlfriend to our house la!"
HuiLing does this 578 times:
"Cha siu zai! There is NO secret between us so you can tell me everything! I mean EVERYthing."

But the point is I AM NOT PREPARED TO HAVE A GIRLFRIEND YET.

I used to think that you must date zillion of girls as long as you're still the robust adolescent with those brisking zing in your blood circulation.
When I grew up a little, I realize it's so MUCH better to have your only one lying on your brawn instead of squirting your nasty spunk into anonymous masquerade dressing slut.
And here is the problem:
How do you know he/she is the one?

If my partner has the similar frequency of brain wave as me, it'll be so vapid! Of course it's easier to communicate but we might end up fighting for the last cup of our favourite maggie mee.

Let's say if my partner has completely opposite characteristics, it'd be so challenging till I might get assailed during slumber because I off the toilet light before I say goodnight.

I don't need a girlfriend who expects me to sms her 24/7 just to make sure she already has her dinner or bathe. I won't give a fuck to these goddamn basic things that even primary school children know how to do it on their own.

I am not the kind of boyfriend who will stick with your ass every moment or smell your hair in study area just to make sure we use the same shampoo.

It doesn't mean my relationship will be so unique or so special but apparently if you know how to use a spoon before you get a boyfriend then why do you need a boyfriend to feed you in public?

We are all independent human and boyfriendgirlfriend-love is just another condiment.

"Dear I am going to shit now."
"Darling I am sitting on the toilet bowl and waiting for the shit to come out."
"Oh yes Baby I am rubbing my ass."
"I am testing my new bra.Love you Honey Muackk!"
This is so wtf right!

May be you will think "ohh my girl is so sweet she tells me everything!"
No offence but personally I think this is freaking saccharine.
Well a Good Morning message will be sweet enough.

Don't Listen To His Crap.
He doesn't even has a girlfriend.

Oh yes spank my ass!

Yes human with a jutting out genital organ listen!

2010-02-07T16:33:00.009+08:00

Unless you have a movable vagina
I've got some clandestine gifts for you guys in batch 4.
Deng Deng Deng Deng....
YOUR VALENTINE GIFT!
---A LADY---

No sex trove.porno video.Penthouse.vibrating condom.or lube.
Don't slink into your wardrobe and fuck yourself .
Because you guys have to get your butts off the beds and luxuriate the REAL fun!
ohh wait.you might need condom and lube.

Let's see who is your Venus!
(yes keep your fingers and toes cross!)

Melvin--Alice
Two of you can go back slumbering in your palace together.

Raymon--Jeannette
This pair is so mathematically and anatomically Brangellina!

Ron--Jac
Emmm...

Kai--Peta
Yes. Go do whatever you wanna do petaytay!

Andy--Leslie
Emmm....

KK--Hui Ling
Aww..so cute!

Jeremy--Angella
What do you think?

Dao Zuo--Joanne
OK ah. cool.

Han Sern--Eliza
Yes you two can study together on Valentine's Day.

Eng Cheong--Si Ying
Spark!

Shan--Sharlene
This was what occured in my dream last week.

Wei Sern--Sabrina
They'll make valentine cookies for each other.

Steven--Aimee
This couple can have rendezvous at Eiffel tower.

Johnson--Michelle
Not bad eh..

Kuo Liang--Melanie
The first couple I matched.

Alex--Hui xin
Everyone can tell..

Mac--Woan Chin
They should be together!

Kelvin--NSP
Ohh..Don't scold me.

Ah Saw--Stephanie
Or he wants somebody else?

Wei Loon--XL
Rumour has it..

Mission accomplished!
GO GO GO!
Don't tell me you don't know her.
You guys still have 1 week.
It's ample to plan a I-am-going-to-melt-your-heart date.

Then how about Clement?
UHHH.
He is dating his pillow.

ps-I terforgot some of them already have their real partners when I was writing this.Sorry.
DOUBLE ps-Tell me your feel about the video! I think it's brilliant!

Because you are my schizophrenic hallucination.

2010-02-01T23:44:00.008+08:00

Your heart can sojourn in my zealous embrace and I might fall in love with you.
But I am not sure about your gender.
Can you murmur it in my heart like how you mooed the valediction?

I spent most of my time on READING recently.
Yes.Book.
Not the Reading which defeated Liverpool on Wednesday (my birthday), at Anfield Stadium.

"Kill Your Friend".
This book is inscrutable REAL!
Besides the torrid description about his sex life which I have to admit it was devilishly titillating ( my prick twitched inordinately ok) , it evinced the human frailties in this festering society.
I luxuriated in the way how John Niven quipped the indigenous greed of human toward chance, status, sex and money so honestly.
This isn't a fairytale. Steven, the hardcore, killed 2 people and he is at the acme of his success when the story ended.
"Asian, in their shitty sub-western dress-tracksuit trousers and 'The Pope Smokes Dope' T-shirts, like Scousers from 1988.."
Yes he is racist. But I laughed so loud when I read this.
I am gonna buy this book.

And I read these masterpieces before the holidays.

"Fight Club"
I prefer reading the book than the movie.
Those sentences are insalubrious but gosh..AMAZING!

"Survivor"
From the insane author of "Fight Club".
This book is in my "to-buy list" too.

"The Reader"
The movie is better, to me.

"Mister Pip"
I can't remember the complete story.
But I know Matilda is a beautiful name.

Anyway, my old friend's son looks cute here.

I teringat him.

2010-01-16T19:13:00.007+08:00

The guy who shares the same brithday on 13th Jan.

See. Injustice.

Somebody was SOOOO right.
*I forgot who said this
We DO facebook more when exams're approaching.
And I crawl in my blog so frequently till I neglected the time to study.

I watch this everyday.

I play this everyday. With Petaytay.
*You're dialu-alukan!!

NOT TO MENTION we also study like hell everyday ok.

5 DAYS MORE!
Then I won't give any fuckinggoddamnmethacryloxypropyltrimethoxysilaneshit to study area and you,NOTES!

Are you ready to put your lips on mine.

2010-01-14T20:15:00.003+08:00

This song is wonderful.

My little brain is being unethical mischievous recently.
Remember about the fellatio and threesome?
Just now I had a grotesque envision again.

I perambulated between two-KL tower height-and-never-ended book shelves.
There were tonnes of books sitting there serenely.
I somehow managed to get the book at the top of the shelf.
Eh. I can fly in my dream..wuuhoo~

Then all of sudden a sexy lady from the middle of nowhere stood right in front of me.
She asked me how to make 2 peanuts ber-sex.

Excuse me? peanuts?
Then we sat down and started talking about dental materials.
wtf.

And I couldn't remember the rest of my dream.

Happy Birthday Clement

2010-01-13T12:14:00.001+08:00

This is emo I know.
But I like it...

"and you know that we're doomed..my dear..we're slow dancing in a burning room.."
urgghhh.kill me.

I thought you're the cacophony.

2010-01-08T14:55:00.003+08:00

You were so noisy for me.
But how on earth do you alter it?

You tint my heart with your intense oscillations
and caress the frozen lacrimal glands so ingenuously.
How can you scrutinize my feeling when I am not prepared at all and when I thought only Taylor Swift is able to do that?

Do you know that the-whatever-prof ferguson-called-blue-colour-solution C didn't even amuse me when it turned everyone into old monster?
My mind was all about you.

Did I make it sounds like a love letter or confession?
Ouuuw. It's for the atypical bacteria band-I don't love you.
Mycoplasma
Chlamydia
Rickettsia

Saya perlu dua biji juga.

2010-01-05T17:25:00.010+08:00

8tv showed American Music Award 2009 at the serene christmas night.
I watched.
Because Taylor Swift gulped down 5 awards but she was preparing something in London.
Dismal.

Then my mum spotted this guy.
"Eh.see..he has nice butt. Look at yours la, like red beans.."

Wtf..

It's ok. I don't blame you because I like your "kiss a girl".
IT'S MY CURRENT RINGTONE!
I get orgasm everytime my phone rings.

Then I ber-emo.
"Eh. Why you have so many pimples? But I like boy with pimples, attractive."
I lagi-lagi emo.

Look at SH, I even doubted he put 2 footballs in his boxers.
And his face..walao..
mosquitos would surely slip down if they stay there more than 1.2 secs.
I am not completely that teruk la actually.
CALL ME if you need to sharpen your pencils.
I have blackheads on my nose and pimples on my cheeks.

This is me.Not the face la.
The body..*insert sad music
But don't worry clement, you'll be like this few years laters.

You know what. Forget about the penis pc muscles exercise.
WHY?
I don't need it anymore ok. Dude my pants is getting tighter.
HAHAHAHAHAHA.

I searched for butt enlargement exercise (BEE!).

And I am doing this every morning before I go to class.

How to exercise for a bigger & rounder butt

After 8 months may be I can say this to Aimee:
oh sorry..I just crashed you with my butt,it's big. And round.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

What if I take orthodontic treatment for my protruded jaw..

Hai betty...

I watch your series. We're friends.

Spread the joy!

2009-12-31T20:58:00.008+08:00

I am not talking about christmas or new year or whatsoever.
Valentine's Day!!!
*if you don't watch the trailer then nobody will want to have sex with you in 2010

Dude, now is only December la.
Tahun Cina belum sampai lagi pun.

CA2 is coming ah.

Fuck off.
Look at my ex.Jessica Alba.
Urgghhh..So hot.

Shut up.
Look at my Taylor Swift.
Argghhh...So sweet.
SGYY(0oopz..hahahaha)

Aimaymay Jeanaynay and all the family members of 'ayay'
Watch this.

Husbands for Sale!

2009-12-20T15:59:00.005+08:00

I was going to write about The Phantom of The Opera and David Tennant but I happened to read this from online journal:

A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City.
Rules at the store:
You may visit the store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch…
You may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.
On the first floor, the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.

The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.

The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely good looking.

'Wow!' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead good looking and help with the housework.

'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!' She proceeds to the fifth floor and reads the sign:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- deadgorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!

So, what do women want? Too fussy or just discerning?

Just an unsignificant contemplation of mine:
We always think that we deserve something better, and not this suck shit ass.
Yes everyone wants a good life.

But we don't get to gauge people just because of the LITTLE PRIDE that we have.
This little pride triggers a lot of catastrophes in our life.
It makes us criticize on classmates' micobiology workbook answers.
It causes us make fun of classmates' outfits.
And of course it make us weep.

Humility. This is what we need.

What if dreams come true.

2009-12-11T12:51:00.005+08:00

I woke up on Monday morning. 3 am.
I had threesome and oral sex with 2 classmates.
The third person must be a stranger. It's the rule.
It was a dream. I checked my pants.
It didn't get stained.

I woke up on Tuesday morning. 5 am.
My classmate lifted me up.
By holding my fully erected penis.
It was a dream. I smirked.
That particular classmate fully gained my attention the whole day in class.

I woke up on Wednesday evening. 6 pm.
Thinking. I am Joe's shivering testicle.
It was Fight Club. I touched my crotch.
I know because Tyler knows.

I woke up on Thursday afternoon. 3 pm.
Used to love the name Poison Ivy in Batman.
I have Poison Tears. Eye infection.
So don't fuck with me.
But the world seems more fantasy.
Nasty human looks a little bit cute in my eyeball, right side.
I still can see the menacing civilization at my left side.
How?

I woke up on Thursday again. It's still young night.
I can barely see the luminous moon.
Singing Don't Stop Believing so loud.
It was a dream.
I know because I only sing to my nostrils.
Never to my ears.

I woke up on Friday morning. 7 am.
Melvin said he was 15 years old.
Hilary Duff said she was 29 years old.
We were casting in a movie.
It was my dream again.I said.
Dear Friday. Dear Ferguson.

Dear Diary.

2009-12-04T16:25:00.005+08:00

Life is not going so gleeful recently.

Because I couldn't get my cavity filling done. I am the only failure in class who still haven't fill the cavity with ZOE yet. Sim Lab owns the dark magic to make me so hagridden. Help me Prof Lupin!!!

This is the song playing in my extracellular matrix whenever I step into Sim Lab.

I couldn't answer Prof Ferguson's question although I already prepared the chapter for 1 whole night.

Dr.Robinson is waiting. PBL is on next week. ARGH he is really freaking me out. He'll eat me, I think...

My teeth casting is so awful. You don't want a patient with that kind of alignment of teeth forever in your life I swear, not even once.

I still don't understand whatever Dr Fauzana teaches in class.

This is my only not-so-rachel-berry-emo-smile in this week. I imitated Aimee.

My hair is so messy recently. It looks like Harry Potter's hair now. But not as famous as his.

And I am doubting whether I can be a good dentist eventhough I am not afraid of needle. But I completely forgot those conservative dentistry or dental materials in module 1.

Sometimes I really feel like I am the-first-one-to-die-when-they-stop-producing-peanut-butter human. I have nothing to make myself proud of. Do I?

I still keeping my diary well. I bersembang with him before I sleep. Dear Diary, your best man is mentioning your name here.

Musical thingy doesn't need any neurotransmitter.

2009-11-30T12:31:00.007+08:00

Neither the receptors nor vesicles.
It can just run through my nerves and vessels beyond dispute, without any conundrum.

This song is permanently stuck in my head.

Glee is utterly my cup of tea (except for the fairy tale that ms cheerleader is dating the mr football captain AGAIN) because...

a) high school. sorry i can't really undertsand those great philosophical logically equivalent enshrouded behind those Oscar awarded dialogues.

b) musical. my artistic extracellular matrix can easily connect my soul with those musical performances.

c) They have a teacher who can sing and dance and RAP. May be Mr G.Paul knows those stuffs as well. God knows.

d) They don't swear too much. Skins is too obscene.

I like this character-Mercedes Jones. Her dialogues are funny.

Wong xue ying do you remember this?

2009-11-27T11:35:00.004+08:00

We sang it in the bus, Andy's car, shopping mall elevators and even market in perlis.

Comparisons are easily done once you've had a taste of perfection

2009-11-19T17:00:00.009+08:00

That's why they feel so intoxicated when they come closer to the popular colony, the perfect dependency.
They pretend like they have the same taste as the king of the popular gang.
Seems like it makes them more perfect.

Or they hate the same person for no reason, just because the so-called-perfect people doesn't like that particular human being.

Sigh.
They are so pathetic.
Even the new born baby owns much more freedom than them.
At least babies can cry whenever they feel hurt.
They only can keep their tears to their bottom of hearts.

Do not lost yourself in the nugatory matters of life.
We all miss the kindergarden-original-type of you.
At least I do.

A quotation from "Fight Club":
Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

We blasted the holidays to the max.

2009-11-15T02:12:00.011+08:00

Jeannette and I headed down to malacca first to get my passport and her teeth.
20 hours in the bus. Back and forth.
First we missed the bus to malacca because we were so busy watching zac efron.
Then we smuggled ourselves to Perlis as we bought the ticket to Alor Setar.
We pretended we fell asleep.
Yes. Typical Malaysian.

First of all you have to get someone who knows Hokkien if you want to go Hatyai.
We got Andy.

Then you need someone who can read the map.
We have Jeannette.

We stayed in Centara Novotel. 5 STARS one ok.
And there is a super cute and diligent bell man--Metee, who eventually becomes our friend.
We tipped him rm10 for his enthusiastic hospitality.

Then we started our real journey, for the whole afternoon.
Too many markets. Too many stalls.
But it was freaking conspicuous that they sell porno everywhere.

And those stuffs weren't that cheap at all.
So don't blame me for not buying souvenirs back.

Hatyai becomes so much alive at night.
We tasted the best tom yum sotong ever and kangkung with fried-cuisine in somewhere then we headed to the momentous high spot of the trip -- Tiger show.

It was on the second floor. It's location was like a labyrinth.
Apparently it didn't has a grand entrance but it give you the BEST exit ever.
Jeannette said we went to the wrong show because it was way too pornographic.
I think it's a live porn show.
Seriously, those completely naked girls and guys just made love and had oral sex on the stage, in REAL 'rocket'.
And the most creative thing is the naked guy played the drum and KEYBOARD with his big penis. They got live band yea.
Those performers had good INTERACTION with the audiences.
I was hiding behind my jacket because I scared those nude girls will come to me.
In brief, we watched everything we can imagine and everything we can't imagine inside there.
Andy said we fully experienced Thailand in that vivid 1 hour. Huh.

We continued mengunjungi the night markets.
Then we Chor Di till 3am.
We have been playing chor di through out the whole week.
I didn't want to sleep because it was my first 5 stars hotel and i am not gonna waste my time on slumber.
I went down to the lobby and enjoyed the live band there. I mean the real band lah.

7.45am. I went swimming and SAUNA.
Nobody wakes up that early I guess so I was enjoying those facilities alone. Cool huh.
Say hello to my 6 packs. I never photoshop this i swear.

We checked out at 11am after playing few rounds of chor di.
There wasn't any big difference between their shopping malls and ours.
We jalan jalan till railway station then 'bye thailand'.

Jean and I spent our Friday in Andy's house.
Andy cooked for us.
Aww..The chicken soup was so freaking scrumptious.

Saturday. Penang.
Jean wanted to look for her prom dress.
She was ber-emo because those pretty dresses were so fucking expensive.
And I got lost in the Quenn's bay. Stupid me.

So..what should i do with my hair..
We have been singing this sentence till now after watching HSM 3 in the bus. HAHAHA.
See everyone in class next monday. Have fun.

Man who sings well is real sexy.

2009-10-25T15:17:00.007+08:00

Go away Taylor swift.sorry wong tan wee...

Yesterday my friend lent me his IL DIVO CD collections.

Listen to some high standard music la instead of the horny 'Tenacious D - Fuck her gently'.

But Tenacious D is funny ok.

I gotta admit it.They are celestial great.
My friend wanted to watch their concert at KL but the ticket was sold 500!!!

Enjoy.
They have beautiful voice. URGGGG..I want it..

I can't sing. I am not sexy at all..
I think steven can sing. His voice is magnetic.
And he knows French.

Diagnosis:This is a 5 minutes entry.

2009-10-24T08:53:00.008+08:00

Pathogenesis:
CA is freaking near.
Running out of time due to those endocarditis or whatever-malysia-furfur it is.

Morphology:
My little brain is having hypertrophy yet the brain cells are not being hyperplasia.
And my hairs keep dropping! wtf..
May be I'll get cerebral sarconoma or carcinoma or any-ma(sounds like edema)..

Clinical features:
PIMPLES.
I don't really abhor those bloody acne. But don't stay on my face lah! Fuck you..
Find another host who never seen you before,like peta?!!?kidding
Go to THE tudung bitch.
Remember ACNE is the mnemonic for major manifestations of chronic rheumatic heart disease?
I got some other weird funny mnemonic such as Girl Friend aNd Bra, My Chemical Romance and Aimee iS PMC..

Histological changes:

Daisy Lowe...Hot hot hot!

The wannabe...

Cute cute cute...

I am getting older

2009-10-09T16:56:00.018+08:00

Few months left to 21 years old.
Obviously everyone is shrieking with excitement for this rocking moment.

White kids don't stay with their parents anymore when they reach this age.
They have their own houses and cars.
They don't need to pass short note to the girl/boy sitting next table anymore.
They don't have to read or watch sexual materials sneakily in toilet.
They have sex and get drunk any minute in their room with the door opened.
This is what I learn from movies.HAHAHA.

I am craving for her.
Urgggg...She is so hot...
But that's one of the reason why those white girls like to marry to Chinese.
Because we have the concept of FAMILY which makes a marriage perfect as most of us still share the same roof with our parents even though we already step into university life.
Emm. I learnt this from some article, not from movie.

Anyway, look at my Chapter 20 & 21- Life in University.
Walao..So fucking miserable.
I have to queue up 20 mins for a wan tan mee.
I talk to the fungi everyday instead of my buddies.
I play with the plaster after class.
Faecal-oral-polio-meningitis comes to my mind whenever I think of oral sex.THANKS TO AIMEE SO MUCH.

I lost my passion for my religion. 911 HELP!

I used to chase my friends on the table when I was in high school. Now I don't even run on ground.

I lost my stoicism listening to lectures completely. Sometimes I have the urge to go in front and slap the lectures with Pathology textbook. And cram my notes into their mouths.

I don't scamper in Tesco anymore. I have HILLS of notes on my tiny scapulars.

Fuck. I am being paranoid before I go somewhere. Those abductors or bus crashes into the cliff thing will come to me first.

Thank God I still have my FRIENDS here. Here are some awesome people in my class.

Hui Ling
She is my shopaholic mum. HAHAHA.
She helps me a lot, in my study, in my personal life etc.
I promise I'll get my dad back for her.

Xue Ying
I met her in library last year when we were doing foundation here.
She recognized me on the first day of BDS orientation.
I think may be it's because I made noise in library when she was preparing for her final paper.

Dai Shan
She has the nicest-sweetest voice in my class.
I bet she will become a great mother one day.
She makes nice foods ok.

Xin Le
She likes to crap.,in a funny way though.
HAHAHAHA.
I was so scared to talk to her for almost 1 year.

Siu Ni
She is the first human whom I made friend with in BDS.
Football DEVIL (MU fans) with 4 Distinctions.
Kuat.

Woan Chin
Her name is Lim Da Wan.
She is very ber-ma fan.HAHAHA.
I like to play with her.

Tan Wee
It's damn weird calling him Tan Wee.
HAHAHA.I can't stop laughing.
By the way, he is the fucker who induces me to ponteng class.

I am tired. To be continued...

That is for you.

2009-10-07T00:17:00.002+08:00

Forgiveness.
I already prepared it few years ago.

Just pick them up from my pocket.
Please do it.

I understand I am so much apart from perfectness.
May be I am not even reaching the NORMAL standard,
if you insist to gauge me with your principles in your particular way.
I'll admit it. I really do.

Be frank, I should have get used to those ungainly taunts, many years ago.
Just that I don't see how fair it is.
My dismal becomes so discernible eventually.
I guess the ability of bearing all these scornful insults is on its way to become part of my DNA.
And when the time has come, you guys can go ahead.
Go inventing your happiness on my imperfection.

I always think that God created me in the way He wants me to be,
and perhaps He wants me to learn something from that.
but may be He never knew that human is so fragile...

A penny of thought

2009-10-04T13:26:00.007+08:00

Human is unearthly bizarre.
They conceived thousand of thousand of notions in their tiny symmetrical cerebrum.
But then they concealed their thoughts in the supreme hippocampus.
And they named it 'Privacy'.
Until Tales and Socrates framed the knowledge of reality and truth.
They called it 'Philosophy'.
Today, human share knowledge through media.
It's 'Gossip'- you know you love me.

Human is disparate eccentric.
Animals are their proprietary slaves, they think.
But animal never released any Dichlorodifluorocarbonmonoxide.
Animals never contaminated the world with those noxious radiations.
We are routed out of the serenity by our intelligence.

Human is incongruous outre.
They listed 'Love' as the titanic element of life.
Adolescents relish the unintelligible relationship, obsessively.
Friends connive at their so-called 'high spot of being teenager'.
Define Love.
-stick with her boob 24-7.
-make use of every inch of your dick.
-reason of day dreaming in class.
The same zero as they get in their exam.
As big as the dinosaur egg.

Human is irrefutable grotesque.
They are so conceited of what they have done.
They are so overwhelmed in their nascent Cloud-cuckoo-lands.
Let's pray for us.

I need inspiration Not just another negotiation.

2009-09-30T18:30:00.009+08:00

No update for my blog recently because:

I am running out of inspiration.

I have HILLS of notes to get done. All powerpoints in second year are so freaking long.

I seldom spruce up nicely.

I got no life. I played with a POP-dick. I was ‘blowing’ it. It sounds so wrong right PETAni. HAHAHAHA.

I video called people whom I am going to see everyday in the circumscribed room.

I don't know how to sing Nsync.

I spotted a Dalek in Andy’s house.

This is the most detrimental alien in Doctor Who.

They look so alike, don't they?

I got the ugliest cavity in Sim Lab which thwarts my way to become a dentist.

I ate a lot of papaya and I shit a lot like how a_me_ does. (Nobody says it's aimee HAHAHA)

I had a lot of dirty conversations with the shitting machine.

I’ll fuck your nasty ass with French fries if you make me xi-beh-du-lan.

I played with a kite yang belum siap lagi.

I listen to Rihanna when I am in gym; like Megan Fox listens to Britney when she is in plane.

I prayed lackadaisically that I could go back asap as the pastor was praying with undulating ardour. I am breaking down to hell.

My keychain is a tampon, it looks like God damn sperm though. I am so fucking sick.

An Iranian girl smiled at me TWICE then I gave her a silly smirk.

Beneath my frail nonchalance, I need romance just like everyone does.

Shanmugam Laksamana(sounds like the melaka hang tuah) told me a joke yesterday.
He said he wants to/will be a bachelor.

Why?

So that he can get double degree.
Wtf......

I'll be a great father.

2009-09-18T22:49:00.006+08:00

"Tell My Father"
This song makes me cry. Everytime!!!!
And the raya holiday makes my tears bigger.

I watched this movie "I AM Sam" on TV2 during holidays.

Sam Dawson (Sean Penn) is a huge Beatles fan.
He works at Starbucks.
He is a single father to a bright daughter named Lucy (Dakota Fanning), whom he named after "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds."

He also has the mental capacity of a seven-year-old, and Lucy has just reached her seventh birthday.
Until this point in her life, Sam has been a competent father to Lucy, thanks to the help of Annie (Dianne Wiest) and a group of mentally challenged friends.

But as Lucy’s capabilities begin to exceed Sam’s, she starts intentionally holding herself back in her studies and becomes subtly antagonistic about her father’s condition with her friends.
After a misunderstanding with a prostitute, the Department of Children and Family Services takes Lucy away, under the belief that Sam cannot properly care for Lucy anymore.

Sam searches for lawyers and finds Rita Harrison (Michelle Pfeiffer), a must-win type with a few domestic troubles of her own. After much persistence on Sam’s part, Rita decides to take his case pro bono to prove a point to her colleagues.

I am impressed by this vivid scene -
Lucy is placed with a foster family who plan to adopt her.
Lucy often runs away from her foster parents in the middle of the night to go see Sam, who moved into a larger apartment closer to her, but each time Sam brings her back.

Lucy does the same arduous thing every night, walking pass the same road, climbing down the same roof, and finally snuggles in Sam’s warm arms.

This evokes memory of my benign granddad.
I saw my granddad yesterday, in my dream.
He past away when I was only 8.
He did not leave me much memory because we seldom have interaction.

My fault.
I was not care about him which makes me so repentant like hell now.
*slap my face left and right.

I remember there was once we went to bus station to fetch somebody up.
I had to sit on his thighs due to the limited seats.
And I fell asleep on the way back home.

He made me leaning on him and cuddled me with his arms.
I couldn’t believe that the skinny arms can actually emit such strong love ripples and melt my heart.
That was the best hug ever in my screwed up life.

Be frank, I MISS him.
I wish he could tell me those World War ll stories before I slumber.
I wish he could teach my children everything he knew.

I’ll definitely give him a big kiss if he were still alive.
I’ll buy him new shirt everytime I go back.
I’ll tell him all my little stupid secrets.
I’ll tell him how badly my primary school mates treated me.
I’ll tell him I failed my CA 2 ospa.
I’ll amble with him through the garden every evening.
And I’ll tell him

--I LOVE YOU GRANDDAD--

*This is my dad. But he is gonna be granddad one day.

Across The Universe

2009-09-14T17:07:00.011+08:00

This is my favourite lullaby. But I prefer Rufus Wainwright's version.

This song reminds me my spontaneous trip 2 years ago, when I just finished my UEC.
I packed few clothes and started my little travel, for a whole month.

Spending most of my time in different buses, from the middle of nowhere to the middle of nowhere, I really love the time I sang out hysterically especially when nobody can hear you. Winds brought my voice to thousand miles away.

Sometimes it could be so apprehensive when I can’t ensure the bus will stop at the right place.
But happiness can be so simple just because you step on the ground again, looking at those strangers who give you a sweet big grin.

I can’t see those little lovely windows anymore.Buses now are so well equipped with air-cond.

I have already done with southern part of Malaysia.
And I wish I have the chance to explore the northern part with my fellow back bag.

Ps. I am so glad that I am the human with long sex pilus. My mum will never let me go out on my own if I were a girl.

In the renewed series Doctor Who ( I am completely mad on this show man) , a British science fiction television programme produced by the BBC, which depicts the adventures of a mysterious alien time-traveller known as "the Doctor" who travels in his space and time-ship, the TARDIS (Time And Relative Dimension In Space).

It normally appears from the exterior to be a blue 1950s police box.

The programme is listed in Guinness World Records as the longest-running science fiction television show in the world, and as the "most successful" science fiction series of all time.

I made my own TARDIS too, one of my favourite toys.

The "roof" is removable, in case I feel like putting whatever shit inside.

The last picture has nothing to do with my entry.
I just think that Taylor Swift looking damn sexy in red.

Am I What I Am (lll)

2009-08-29T00:44:00.006+08:00

I am not a good guy. I steal, I lie, I gossip, I jealous, I have poor emotion management, I am fussy, I am lazy, I am not good at anything except being invisible.

I did not pay attention in class. I liked to stare at Dr. Mohan’s nose, Prof. Marya’s tie, Prof. Smales’s hair, Prof. Comfort’s jaw, Aimee’s new dress, how Sabrina tied her hair and play with Han Sern’s recorder.

I jack off when I lose control. Some guys feel so ashamed to admit it. Come on. This is part of our NORMAL life. We NEED it. Even girls also need it ok.

I don’t know how to behave myself as a university-year 2 student. Talk about politics? economic tribulation? I just know how to make 3 years old baby cries.

I think soccer players have the sexiest thigh and bum. So I am working hard on my thigh. My mum always complains I have no arse.

Sometimes I don’t don a smile on my face and sauntering around the campus alone. I just want to hear how my heart says about me. People just don’t get it and keep guessing the badass who provokes me.

My mum needs my company when we do shopping even she is buying lingerie or knickers. Seriously I am abashed surrounding by those sexy-big tits-lips-biting models advertisements.

I am curious women do blowjob for their own pleasure or for the men.

I learnt How to Speak Scottish Accent in YouTube. I failed.

I always want an elder brother. So he can share some things with me. Or teach me some THINGS that my dad doesn’t want to talk about. Lalala…

I like to play sliding board more than swing.

Omelette is my favourite food.

I never ask a girl out for a date.

I sleep with tight boxer short, or sometimes I naked, only when I am alone in room ok. My friend once thought I sleep with swimming trunks.

I googled ‘how to shout’. I don’t know. My shout is so not the real shout.

My mum always asks me to be like those holy teenagers who spent most of their time in church. I just want to ask them: Do you feel guilty when you watch porn?

I have never been in a Starbucks.

I believe in Aliens.

Everytime my mum scolds me, I feed her plants with the soup she cooks.

I was sitting in library and dreamed about AIMST chose me to be the model of those poorly-colours-matched brochures and some model companies spotted me and sponsored me to take part in American Top Model. Then I won and walking on the red carpet with Kate Winslet. Ok. I am a little carried away. And by the way, it’s Hollywood red carpet.

I hate reunion. It does not mean I hate my friends.

Cute-cute, the goldfish at home is not the same goldfish that my grandma gave me to look after when she went to Singapore.

I am afraid to go out with California-people. Kampong-Hang Tuah-people suits me better.

Seriously I’ll give a big slap if my partner talks to me in the babyish-act cute-coquetry tone.

I always have the impulse to put my plate upside down in front of Jaya Catering workers for giving me a nostril size chicken piece.

I used to hug my friends a lot which I think it is a kind of love and power teleport but they think it is sickness, sexual harassment. Fuck you. Experts proved that it is good for health you big moron.

This is extremely true and weird. I make the same dream everytime I get high fever.

I have 7 bags in my wardrobe. Too much?

I’ve never done anything to make my parents proud of me. Never.

Honestly I like Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton. I don’t know why people hate them.

I like to notice people who is clearing their nostrils and where do they hide the shit.

If you can’t be honest with your friends and loved ones, then what is life all about?

Am I What I Am (ll)

2009-08-24T02:00:00.013+08:00

I have secrets.
Of course I do.Everyone has secrets.
I’m not talking about huge, universe-shattering secrets.
Not the-aliens-are-coming-and-only-lady gaga-can-save-us type secrets.
Just little, normal, stupid secrets.

I like Cameron Diaz’s smile. It’s Sexy. Julia Robert’s is different. I call it Mercy.

I am 179cm. Not 180 like what I told everyone. And to be fair, it’s only 1 cm different.

I am afraid of the dark, always have been. I can’t stop thinking is there really a red dress ghost combing her fucking long hair behind me when the light is off.

I got the scar by falling into a big stink ditch because my neighbour kids dare me.

I hate to go church during Christmas.

I sometimes sit in lecture room and think, why are those people raise their fucking hands up? Put it down. I want to leave.

The dumpling that JH’s mother made was the most disgusting thing I’ve ever tasted. I threw it into toilet bowl and flushed it and I told her mum that was delicious. Then she gave me more. I shouldn’t lie.

Sometimes, when I am in the swimming pool, I suddenly want to naked-swim.

I once had this weird gay dream about my “somebody”.

I’ve always had this deep-down conviction that I’m not like everybody else, and there’s an amazingly exciting new life waiting for me just around the corner.

May be I’ll crush into Prof. Smales and then I help him to pick up those files spread over the floor then he invites me to spend my 6 weeks holidays in London.

There was once I sat in gallery, looking at Ron, KK, Daozuo, Andy, Jeanette, Aimee, XL, Sabrina and Peta. Wow. They are so Manhattan-people. Then the very-Idaho-me secretly named them --“Swan People”.

I don’t know what G-spot is.

I twitter recently and I fake my identity as a sunny-hunky-blonde boy from Cardiff.

I am still a virgin. Does ‘virgin’ works on male?

I always want to apologize to Ms A, B and C but I never. Sorry. Actually I knew how you three nice girls felt/feel about me. I am just not so into a new relationship. And Mr. Z, thanks for asking me out on a date. I’ll call you if I turn gay.

My Nike bag is fake, rm15 from pasar malam.One of my friend said my nike bag looks gorgeous so he bought a same one (according to him) from the nike shop.It cost him rm4x.xx and he told me he was lucky because it was cheap.

Just now dinner time, when my dad said, “What are you thinking about?” and I said,” Oh, nothing,” that wasn’t quite true. I was actually wondering how I will look like if my mum married a Scottish.

I always wishing there is some Scottish and Swedish running in my blood stream. Scottish and Swedish mixed will be the sexiest, for me. You know that kind of blonde hair and crystal blue eyes.

Am I What I Am

2009-08-16T02:36:00.006+08:00

Bravura show, by John Barrowman.
At least I do think so.
The lyric is obtrusive and meaningful.

Candidly I know myself quite well. I really do.
I know what I want.
I know what I love.
And I know who I am born to be.
Notwithstanding, there is still a HUGE catastrophic fiasco in myself.

I AM NOT WHAT I AM.
This is ludicrous.
I am just the doll that the society wants,
the doll that my parent expecting me to be.
Environment is deciding for me
what to do, where to go.
I know this is absurd.
But this is me.

People just can’t see the ripple undulating in my heart.
Struggle.
Contemplation.
Not their faults though because I let it happen.

My parent determined my future.
Yes you are right.
Dentistry is not my choice. And it’ll never be.
My mum pushed me to physic tuition when finally I got my only chance to learn piano.
My dad sent me to boarding school when I found a teacher who was kindly enough to teach a 12 years old boy some painting stuffs.

And I ended up don’t know anything about art and music except those F=ma and how to stay with 20 students in a room.
Not the time for fingers pointing
I know they want to give me the best.

I don’t really want to be a dentist.
*but i would love to consider the wage
I hate biology. I swear.
I never score A for biology.
I won the Senior Math Champion, ACCIDENTALLY.
Gosh. I hate math so much.
I joined the competition because they would give us hamper if the whole class takes part.
I don’t like wedding dinner.
But my parent keep saying I need to meet those relatives.
“wah..so pandai ah..mau jadi doctor ah..”
“wah..so tall now. Remember last time you were so small bla bla bla..”

Ok.I have no idea how to continue. Dammit.

This is a letter to JS

2009-08-15T00:13:00.008+08:00

It was entirely a surreptitious accident
I met you abruptly but I did not know that I’ll be in love with you one day
I don’t know what to do
yes I love you
The first time I understand why couples can stick with each other 24/7
The first time I want to be with you every single minute
I’ll swallow my pride if you’ll stay for the years

You are always so confident
You are the way you are
You always fuck up those strangers don’t you

I sacrificed a lot to maintain our relationship
I stayed up for you in those uncountable frosty
nights
with smiles, and with tears
*gosh my mum is gonna kill me if she knows I didn’t sleep by 12am

But then see what you have done to me
You left
You just left me like my heart is a hotel for you
Check in then check out, whenever you want to
Have you ever realize that everytime you came, you step right into the centre of my heart
That primary immunity protection was automatically off for you

Like the meteor cracked the ground
Only a huge hole left
Then you vanished
Everytime I think about you I can’t breath
like being stabbed by the thorns of the rose
But I can’t help myself

May be I need a slumber but I am scared
Fretting about it would not help
What if I feel better after the slow wave sleep
I don’t want to feel better because it means that I am letting you go
It means that I don’t care about you as much as I do right now
I really don’t want to leave my love and passion on the ebb
What if I’ll forget you after the long sweet dream
You are part of my memory
And I want to keep it intact
Only you and me

It’s a real buzz to have you in my heart
Tears start to prick my eyes
I can’t lose you but do I have another choice?

Time is the best medicine and it always does
That’s why I am writing this down
As the emblem of my love
In case one day you become an insignificant speck in my memory
but remember
I love you

WannaBeDiarylll

2009-08-09T21:55:00.011+08:00

Today is the 97582724935721 years. In Azkaban.
Yes. The prison.

The gates clanked.
Squinting through the dim moonlight, I could barely see few silhouettes were headed towards me.
Who the hell are they?

Spy? Maniac?
Is this their clandestine fraud to get the map?
Curiosity is pricking my scalp.

A faint apprehension flickered across my complexion.
I saw the trademark thunder scar at the side of his forehead.
Harry Potter.
Another two must be his companions, Hermione and Ron.
And the rest, must be Death Eaters.

Those Death Eaters jostled three of them into the narrow passage.
Ron seemed somewhat loath to stride over.
In high dudgeon, Hermione kept repeating those spells which apparently she was just wasting her energy.
I flinched at the corner as they were approaching me.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Obscuro .”
Great job, muggle. It blocked those dementors’ vision completely.
“Expecto Patronum.”
This was the second thing they did once they step into my cell.
Bravo.
“Evanesco. “Vanishing Spell.
They hid their wands well.

Dementors started making commotion now.
A shudder of fear ran through everyone.
Yes. They were sucking their happiness, again.

“You show great composure infront of dementors. They cause no harm to you? Where is your patronus? Who are you?” Hermione stood, contemplating something in her small brain.

“Well. Frankly, I am impressed, Ms Granger. Brilliant.” I continued before she butt in, “I am...”

“You are vampire!” Hermione blurted out.

“Why not you shout it louder so that the Death Eaters can hear you and then you can become the vampire murderer at the next moment indirectly?” But my indignation plummeted at the next second because this was just a blunder. Everyone has this response when they met the vampire in their life for the first time.

“I don’t understand.” Ron kept a wary eye on me, asking in a disquieting tone. I can see the muss flickering in his eyes.

"Because I am dead. I have no thought.Nobody ever realizes it. Those dementors either. The pangs of agony showing on my face was just a play. Now you understand Mr.Westley and...Mr.Potter. Nice to meet you.By the way, I am clementander Skarsgard." I explained in a rather lackadaisical tone, nonchalantly.

Jinxx..

“Harry! Look at his canines!” Ron was agog.

“Gosh. To be more precise, it’s fang.” Seriously his idiosyncrasy put my patience on the ebb, “A penny for your thought Harry.”

“No. I am thinking..emm..nothing.” Harry gave me a sweet beam, hastily.

“I know what is in your mind Harry. Prison Break. I’ll help you.” I whispered.

“This is insane and impossible. There is no way you can escape from Azkaban and the bizarre building structure.” Hermione was trying to thwart Harry.

“But I can’t let Voldemort kill everyone outside there. I am the chosen one to hamper the catastrophe.” Harry showed his pertinacious conviction.

“Listen. This is ludicrous. You really think you can get out of here? Those Death Eaters reconstruct the whole shield and they curse on it. ” Ron asked in a tinge of anxiety.

Staring quizzically at the window, I replied:“Of course you can if you design the prison…”

-----to be continued.more spells.more adventures.more dangerous----

*ideas taken from harry potter.prison break.true blood.
I am honest boy I swear.

WannaBeDiaryll

2009-08-03T14:14:00.015+08:00

I just finished bathing.
My assistant sent me my schedule for tomorrow, while I am still rubbing my hair and haven't get the chance to put my pyjamas up.
Fuck! What a hectic day I am having.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

8.00 am
- play basketball with chace crawford, zac efron.

10.00 am
- pay suri a visit which you promised her last year.

11.30 am
- new movie characters discussion co-star
george clooney, blake lively, emma watson

2.35 pm
- advertisement photo section with david beckham, michael phelps

6.00 pm
- new album songs recording.featuring lady gaga.

9.30 pm
- dinner with wentworth miller, mischa barton

11.00 pm

-clubbing time.
lindsay lohan, megan fox, jude law, eminem

---------------------------------------------------------
I don't really appreciate this kind of life.
But what to do.
I am renowned celebrity.

WannaBeDiary

2009-07-28T17:22:00.009+08:00

oblonGATAL :
wow wow wow.
So glad to see you here, Mr Clemente.
Such an coincidence.
Btw, I am the editor from Brainstem Magazine.
Can I have the honour to talk to you. just for a while?

Clemente :
Hey. Just call me Clem.
And by the way, this is not coincident.Bitch.
I know you have been following me for a couple of weeks.
Tell me, what's your fucking vocation?

oblonGATAL :
hmm.
Don't worry. I am a good girl.
I don't swear.I never have sex before.I don't watch porn.
Is that all right for you to have the interview here?
I mean, beside the swimming pool.
And only with your tight swimming trunks?

Clemente :
Yes.Bitch.What's the matter with you?
This is your only precious chance to see my fucking hot hunky body.
Don't you want it?
Every girl dribbling for it like hell I tell you.

oblonGATAL :
oh yea.
I am honoured to have this opportunity.
Emm.Can you tell me how do you feel for being chosen as the
hottest porn star king AGAIN?

Clemente :
Alright.
Nothing much.
This is already my fifth time picking up the fucking crown.

oblonGATAL :
Why do you think people love you so much?

Clemente :
Well.
I think they love my celestially freaking sexy body.
And of course, I have the fucking biggest dick in the world.
A~hahahaha..
You want to see it?

oblonGATAL :
oh no. Thanks.

Clemente :
Oh babe. Don't be such a hypocritical prude.
I know you want it fucking much.
~pull her head over~
You like it?

oblonGATAL :
Aww.That is impressive.
Your mum was surely astonished by it..

Clemente :
Come on.
You believe this is a real one?
I made plastic surgery ok.
Michael Jackson was beside me that time.
He was trying to get his fake nostril overhauled.

oblonGATAL :
Wow. Who persuaded you to make this?
Your mum knew it?

Clemente :
This is entirely my own idea ok.
It's like woman always wants big boob.
And it was my dream to become the porn star king.
Hence it's a fucking must for me to make myself stand out.
More outshining than others idiots.
This's the philosophy of Nietzsche.You know?

oblonGATAL :
emm..emm..

Clemente :
oh you fucking bimbo.
Go back and study more ok.
Your mama will be so shamed of you.

oblonGATAL :
How dare you call me fucking bimbo.
Arg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am going to bite off your fucking fake dick and fry it!!!
Arg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~crush~
~chew~chew~

Clemente :
Help me..Help my dick..call 911!!!

oblonGATAL :
oh I am so sorry you fucking eunuch.
Hahaha..
I wana witness your wound haemorrhage and die.
Hahahahahahahaha..

-------------------------The End--------------------------

As liberated as the fat white dove flapping its greater wings.of sphenoid.

2009-07-24T19:43:00.009+08:00

I think graduation does not really suit me.
I am saying this not because I fail my exam.
BUT I hate to stay in my room with my head hiding behind the curtain yang bercolour purple and peeping people taking those cabs and leave the hell.
Of course I am going back home.
As usual.
One day later than others.

I can even feel that my baby leukocytes are yelling at their host.
"Get us fuck off from here!"
And those thousand years old spiders crawling on the ceiling would say
''Shut up.WBCs.
You ain't even got enough sense to pour piss out of a boot."

Huh.Calm down boy.
Spider has 8 legs.
They wear more shoes than you do.

So.I have been spending my day watching True Blood.
It's fantastic. Totally addicted to it.
I wish that I can date a vampire and have sex with her.

Ok.It's just a story.
wake up clement.

I know holiday is the best time for movie marathon.
Just check out the movies I am bringing back home.

1.Harry Potter.
2.The Lord of The ring.
3.Enchanted.
4.HSM
5.Lion King 2.
6.The Hunchback Of Notre Dame.

remember.
NOLIPS.NOKISS.NOSEX.NOBED.NOPENIS.NOOBSCENITY.
My gracious grandma is spending her precious time in my house now.
I can't envisage if she happen to see my eye balls goggle at those seducing sex scene in the screen of my laptop.

Gosh.
I don't know CPR.

我的日出日落迷了路

2009-07-18T21:55:00.003+08:00

我不懂自己
我逃避自己
以为
这样的一种暧昧
会遮盖自己过去的愚昧

一直觉得
只要不去理会
那让人喘不过气的高贵
或许我会勇敢地去追
至少
我的血液里会留下友情的气馁

放不下
童年的沧疤
也放不下
眼泪随着自己低头而下的挣扎
路再大
却有多少人愿意被它容纳

真讽刺
2007年高三毕业生的两首毕业主题曲
是我填的词

真讽刺
2007年高三忠班的主题歌
也是我写的字

真讽刺
我的手交出了友谊的层次

而
自己的心
却始终感觉不出友谊的真挚

并不害怕主动
只是在担心
自己的感情汹涌却
换来了心碎的暴风

他们不知道
毕业歌的原名其实是《我们的日出日落》
并不是毕业刊上印烙着的《朋友》

但那确实是为朋友们而写的爱
虽然
那一段距离依然还在